113: Things people will say when you tell them you’re moving abroad (and how you should respond to them)
The Most Common Things People Will Say (and What They Really Mean)
If you’ve told someone you’re thinking about moving abroad, you’ve probably already experienced it—the opinions, the doubts, the “concerned” questions that come almost immediately.
This post breaks down Things People Will Say When You Move Abroad (and How to Respond), including why these comments show up and how to handle them without defending yourself, overexplaining, or second-guessing your decision.
Before making any big move, preparation matters. If you haven’t yet, check out Episode 104: Before You Move Abroad, Take This One Trip First to avoid common and costly mistakes early in the process.
Why People React Negatively When You Say You’re Moving Abroad
When people react negatively, it helps to understand why. In most cases, these comments are not meant to stop you. Instead, they usually come from fear, uncertainty, or confusion about change.
Fear Disguised as Concern
For many people, living abroad feels unfamiliar. Because of this, fear often shows up as concern or worry. Even so, this reaction usually comes from care, not criticism.
Projecting Their Own Insecurities
In other situations, people want change but feel stuck. As a result, when you take action, it highlights the gap between what they want and what they believe they can do.
Fear of Loss and Distance
Meanwhile, friends and family may worry about distance. In addition, even if they do not say it directly, this fear of separation often shapes their response.
Misunderstanding What Moving Abroad Involves
Finally, some people assume moving abroad is extreme or impossible. This happens because they do not understand visas, cost of living, or everyday life abroad.
The Most Common Things People Will Say When You Move Abroad
Below are reactions almost everyone hears. At the same time, each example shows a simple way to respond with confidence.
1. “Is it safe?”
What it really means: Fear of the unknown.
How to respond:
“Actually, many places abroad are statistically safer than the U.S.”
2. “Aren’t you worried about healthcare?”
What they mean: They only know the U.S. system.
How to respond:
“That’s one reason I’m moving, because healthcare is often more affordable abroad.”
3. “But you don’t even speak the language!”
What they mean: They cannot imagine doing it themselves.
How to respond:
“I’ll learn once I’m there. In fact, many people do.”
4. “It’s expensive to live abroad.”
What they mean: They are thinking like a tourist.
How to respond:
“In reality, daily life is often cheaper than U.S. cities.”
5. “Are you running away from something?”
What they mean: They see big change as risky.
How to respond:
“No. Instead, I’m moving toward something better.”
6. “What about your career?”
What they mean: They think careers only grow one way.
How to respond:
“However, international experience can help over time.”
7. “What about your family?”
What they mean: Fear of distance.
How to respond:
“We’ll stay connected, and visits will still happen.”
8. “Why now? Why not wait?”
What they mean: Change feels uncomfortable.
How to respond:
“There’s never a perfect time, so now makes sense.”
9. “I could never do that.”
What they really mean: They wish they could.
How to respond:
“Most people can, but it takes planning.”
10. “Aren’t you scared?”
What they mean: They believe fear should stop you.
How to respond:
“Yes. Even so, I’m doing it anyway.”
11. “What if you hate it?”
What they mean: They think the move is permanent.
How to respond:
“If that happens, then I can always move again.”
12. “Don’t people overseas hate Americans?”
What they mean: They trust headlines too much.
How to respond:
“In reality, people are often curious and welcoming.”
13. “Is it safe for a woman to move alone?”
What they mean: Safety fears shaped by U.S. news.
How to respond:
“In fact, many countries are safer for women.”
14. “What if something happens and you’re far away?”
What they mean: Fear of losing access to you.
How to respond:
“We’ll probably talk more than we do now, because communication is easier than ever.”
15. “Isn’t that irresponsible?”
What they mean: They link change with risk.
How to respond:
“On the contrary, this is a very intentional choice.”
What These Comments Say About Them (Not You)
When people question your move abroad, it is rarely personal. Instead, these reactions reflect fear more than facts.
- For example, people defend the life they chose
- In addition, people fear what they do not understand
- As a result, your decision challenges their comfort zone
Because of this, the comments lose their power.
How to Stay Confident When People Doubt You
1. Remember Your “Why”
First, reconnect with the future you are building. In other words, focus on what you want, not outside opinions.
2. Talk to People Who Get It
Next, find community. For example, talking to others who understand helps a lot.
3. Set Boundaries
At the same time, remind yourself that explanations are optional. Instead, choose what feels right for you.
4. Focus on Facts, Not Fear
Finally, rely on facts. For instance, visas, safety data, and cost of living help reduce doubt.
Final Thought
If you are hearing these comments, you are not alone. In fact, almost everyone who moves abroad hears the same things.
You are not irresponsible.
You are not unrealistic.
Instead, you are being intentional.
Curious About Healthcare Abroad?
If healthcare is one of your biggest concerns, listen to Episode 75: Healthcare Systems in Europe: What Americans Need to Know to understand how care, costs, and access really compare to the U.S.
